 Dir. Philip Miller, USA, 61 mins Hey! I see you, Nick Philips! You can’t hide behind that pseudonym, you know… Earlier this year, I developed a borderline obsession with the low-budget work of one Nick Philips. Although a little detective work (thanks IMDB!) tells you even that’s not his real name, which is actually Nick Millard. And, with Satan’s Black Wedding, we have a third nom-de-plume thrown into the mix. That’s not to mention Alan Lindus, Clem Moser, Otto Wilmer, Jan Anders and even more besides that were also various guises for this director. And let’s not forget that most of these movies have more than one title – not that uncommon for the time, but it can become something of a minefield for a viewer. So, this is Satan’s Black Wedding, and a distinctive change of pace from the slashers we’ve seen previously. The difference is apparent immediately, as we lead with piano music over Gothic art rather than that bloodstained openings we’re accustomed to. And while there are absolute lashings of claret in this one, it’s not about a murderer this time at all – it’s about an undead priest and the coven of vampires he is in control of, which is expanding all the time. Our story follows detective Mark Gray, who is hot on the case with a number of strange deaths going on, with bodies being completely drained of their blood. What could it be, I hear you wonder? Anyway, in the midst of all this, Mark’s own sister has gone missing, and he’s been left with a very strange manuscript she was in the process of co-writing with a beautiful and mysterious woman whom Mark becomes entwined with. This leads him to the mysterious Father Daken, whom we eventually find out has officially been dead some 150 years… Now, while I can’t say this is any kind of a classic, it does represent a step up on the likes of Criminally Insane and Doctor Bloodbath. It actually feels like a film, with characters seen interacting on screen. The production values aren’t great, but do feel a bit better apart from some pretty terrible sound design – it’s a little bit painful hearing all those hard s’s being hit throughout. The cast of actors is very different for this one, and they’re a little better, despite Father Daken looking a little like he’s on loan from Manos: The Hands of Fate. The plot does have some sort of intrigue and a twist ending that maybe even makes a little sense. The blood effects don’t look too bad, although the vampire teeth installed for each character are truly terrible and almost jolted me out of the film entirely. So, yeah, it is bad, but it’s not terrible. There were bits of this film that I liked, but there were still a number of issues despite a host or areas being improved from Millard’s previous work. The atmosphere was decent and the musical choices were pretty good, the performances were mostly just one side or the other of OK and again the idea was decent enough, if maybe a bit too Hammer-esque to stand out as a really original concept. The problems really lie in the poor effects and a couple of instances where the acting became really hammy and overdone. I wouldn’t suggest anyone go out of their way to check this out, but if you have gotten a kick out of Millard/Philips’ work from before then this is certainly an improvement on those. RATING: 3.5/10. In its own weird way, this one was a pleasant surprise. There are plenty of great movies it’s not a patch on, but it’s practically a masterpiece by the benchwork of the other offerings from this director. The idea and delivery has a certain appeal, but there are still a number of fundamental flaws in various areas of this one. If I can track down any more of the director’s work I just might, because it’s steadily become a sort of grim fascination for me. This one ranks as the best of the bunch so far, but still lands a modest 3.5/10.   |
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