BOOK REVIEW: RICKY'S HAND BY DAVID QUANTICK

17/8/2022

Ricky's Hand solidifies Quantick's reputation as a master of the comedic horror novel; hilarious, thrilling and utterly bonkers, you are in for a wild ride with this book.

Ricky's Hand by David Quantick
Publisher ‏ : ‎ Titan Books (9 Aug. 2022)
Language ‏ : ‎ English
Paperback ‏ : ‎ 304 pages
ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 1803360461
ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1803360461

A Book Review by Jim Mcleod

You need hands to show the world you're happy
And you need hands when you have to stop the bus
But the hands we love so dear are the hands we love to hear
Are the hands that you give to us
Everybody, are the hands that you give
Everybody, that's nice, thank you,
Thank you, ladies and gentlemen; thank you

Well, Max Bygraves, better watch for what he wishes for, for sometimes the hands that you are given are not the hands that you really want. That's the predicament Ricky Smart finds himself in one morning when he wakes up to find, to his extreme horror, that one of his hands is not his. In place of his normal silky smooth hands; he discovers that one of them is a lot larger than his other one, a hand that would be more at home at the end of the arm of a massive biker, rough calloused and emblazoned with nice "FUCK" tattoo.

Now obviously, all of us would be rather bothered about this, and Ricky is suitably horrified at his unusual and disturbing predicament; after a hilarious trip to his local accident and emergency department, Ricky does what he does fairly averagely and sets out to investigate what is happening to him, while trying to eke out a living at the other thing he does fairly averagely as a low down dirty paparazzo, that's right, that is the correct term, not paparazzi, you learn something new every day reading great books.

This brings him to a disastrous encounter with the mega popstar Scala Jaq and her overprotective manager, which results in Ricky losing his beloved camera, and any chance of a big payout. However, Ricky and Jaq's lives are soon to become intertwined in a mysterious and fantastical journey of terror, sidesplitting laughs for us, not them; there are no laughs for them, as they encounter a unique support group for others who, like them are finding that parts of their bodies are being slowly replaced with bits from other people.

For those of you who aren't familiar with the works of David Quantick, you are in for a brilliant treat here; he is a genuine master of acerbic wit, genuinely funny with a keen eye for looking at the world around us with a sly smile and a cutting way with words that strips away the stupidity of our mediocre and meaningless lives.

Ricky's Hands is no exception; this is a wonderfully caustic and hilarious read, filled with brilliant one-liners, long setups to jokes that never fail to hit their mark, and a story that is utterly bonkers. Yet, for some reason, that escapes me, kind, grounded in the sense of bizarre believability.

Ricky is an outstanding protagonist; when people picture a classic antihero, Ricky has to be the person they see in their mind's eye. While reading Ricky's Hands, I couldn't help but picture Ricky acting like and looking like Steve Dallas from the Bloom County comic strips. A sort of surly, down and out, who never does anything unless it helps him, kind of sleazy, kind of cheap, but despite all of this, you can't help but kind of like him. Imagine if Arthur Dent had grown up in the 80s, surrounded by booze, cigarettes and strip clubs. Hero is a word you couldn't even throw in his general direction.

As a lead protagonist, Ricky is perfect for this novel; it allows Quantick to focus the majority of the comedic parts of the book on him, in particular, his relationships with his "friends", especially Isinglass, a friendship best summed up by this quote from the book...

"ten minutes later, Isinglass was throwing pebbles at seagulls, and Ricky was beginning to feel quite dizzy."

I loved their relationship and how it was based more on mutual sneering respect than true friendship. However, it is Ricky's relationship with his sister, who is a police officer, that is the shining moment of the character interactions of this novel. Katie is an avatar of disdain concerning her brother Ricky; she won't put up with any of his bullshit and takes great pleasure in letting him know that. It is here that Quantick fully unleashes his acerbic and cutting wit, honestly some of the finest comedic moments ever committed to a horror novel.

Now while the title of this novel is Ricky's Hands, Ricky isn't the driving force of the narrative; that honour, as far as I am concerned, goes to Scala Jaq, a strong-willed super, successful pop star. It is Scala who takes full charge of their investigation into what is happening to the pair of them and the members of their body transference support group. It was refreshing to see Quantick not take the easy and safe road of having Scala as your stereotypical young pop star diva. Yes, she initially has diva-like moments, but she quickly transforms into a vital, powerfully minded woman who won't take crap from anyone, even if the people responsible for what is happening are rather frightsome and nasty. Watching the character development of both Ricky and Scala was a highlight of this hugely entertaining novel.

Now, as for the plot of this novel, it is best left at a brief description of it at the beginning of this review. Suffice to say; you are in for a wild ride. Quantick handles the sheer lunacy of what is happening with the skilled hand of a master storyteller; just when you think you know what is going on, Quantick rips the rug right from under your feet. It is a wild and crazy answer as to the reason as to why they are having parts of their body exchanged with others, but Quantick keeps everything grounded with a tight narrative and a cast of brilliant characters. So even when the true nature of what is going on, you don't start thinking to yourself, "what a load of bollocks" it was a brave move on his part to go this route, but he pulls it off vivaciously, with verve and wit by the bucket load.

Ricky's Hand solidifies Quantick's reputation as a master of the comedic horror novel; hilarious, thrilling and utterly bonkers, you are in for a wild ride with this book. I just can't decide what is more horrific, the events of this novel, or the fact that I made me remember that god awful song from Max Bygraves!

Ricky's Hand
by David Quantick

From the Emmy Award-winning writer of Avenue 5, Veep and The Thick of It comes a funny, violent and thought-provoking horror story like nothing you’ve seen before.

Ricky Smart is a nobody, a Miami Beach paparazzo who scrapes a living snapping celebs. One day Ricky wakes up and realises there’s something wrong with his hand. It’s not his hand. In fact, it’s someone else’s hand. How does he know it’s not his? Because it looks different, feels different and – perhaps the biggest clue – has a four-letter word tattooed across the knuckles.

But hey, it's still a hand, and it works just fine, so that's ok. Except a week later, his other hand changes. And a few days after that, Ricky gets a new arm…

Ricky is losing his mind as well as his body parts, but he has to pay rent and those seedy photos aren't going to take themselves. The world needs candid shots of pop sensation and local girl Scala Jaq, almost as much as Ricky's bank account does. Yet Scala has a secret of her own, a secret that leads them to an unlikely partnership, the strangest support group ever, and revelations that threaten existence as they know it.

It's up to the celebrity and her tormentor to work out what to do with a world of misfits, explosions, and other people's bad tattoos. Because when you've looked for redemption in all the right places, you might need to try the wrong ones.