 In Duncan P Bradshaw's previous novel, Mr Sucky (read our review of it here), we were bombarded by one of the most insane and crazy concepts in horror history. A glorious mix of extreme horror and humour, Mr Sucky saw Bradshaw rise from being a great writer to the heady heights of a must-read author. Only someone who fully understands the dynamics between laughter and fear could pull off a book that made you laugh as much as it made you cringe at the horrors contained within it. But what is an author to do after producing not only a career-defining novel but a genre-defining novel? I'll tell what, he says 'hold my beer, I'm going in for the kill. Judging by the reaction I had reading Cannibal Nuns from Outer Space! (yes that exclamation mark is both needed and well deserved), Bradshaw must have been drinking a beer spiked with a quadruple shot of vodka, and a good old dash of Buckfast, for this is a novel that piles on everything that Mr Sucky brought to the table to the max. The plot of Cannibal Nuns from Outer Space (CNFOS) couldn't be more straightforward. A band of space aliens that just happen to look like earth nuns have landed on earth with the sole purpose of turning us into one massive factory farm for a multitude of meat-hungry alien gourmands. The only thing standing in their way is a washed up Catholic Priest and his mutated pet axolotl. Yep, you got that right the priest has a pet amphibian that lives in his beard. This should be enough to give you an idea of the level of severe philosophical discourse in this novel, which is zero. What you have instead is a novel that grabs your funny bone by the arm and straps it to a tickleomatic 2000 and sets to maximum ticklage. Like all of the other great comic authors such as Pratchett, Adams and Strand, (sorry I was hoping to write this review without mentioning the first of these two authors, it's a tired and cliched comparison), Bradshaw understands that for a comedic novel to work it just can't be a page after page of one-liners, puns and punchlines, there has to be a good story underpinning the gags. While (CNFOS) may lack some of the serious undertones of the aforementioned authors, it still has a solid narrative backbone, that is thought out and delivered with enough gusto to keep the reader interested in the story and the characters within it while allowing for Bradshaw to go town with his totally on point brand of humour. Imagine being strapped onto the front of a speeding jet, that's pretty much the rush you will experience from reading this book. The keen-eyed among you will recognise many hat tips and winks to other works, of particular note, is the account told by the world's worst taxi driver, I won't spoil it for you, suffice to say that it is one of the most excellent chapter length jokes ever committed to the page although Bradshaw does lose some points for his plain crazy and utterly wrong theory on who is the best singer in Boyzone. And his account of Father Flynn's debunking of a "weeping statue" will have you laughing your socks off while you reach for the sick bucket. Taking centre stage is Father Flynn, the once top operative for the Order of the Crimson Rosary, a specialised branch of the Catholic Church charged with protecting humanity from all manners of evil. Flynn comes across like a mix of all the worst bits of Bernard Black, Father Jack and Albert Steptoe, and you will relish at is ineptitude while cheering him on in his bumbling quest to save us from the Nuns. Bradshaw has a unique talent for writing believable characters despite their, at times, grotesque caricaturist nature. He fills in their broad strokes with a fine brush of detail and personality. As the title suggests this was never going to be a serious read, where Bradshaw takes a look at the dilemma of being a space-faring race of carnivorous aliens and the ethics of factory farming, instead you are rewarded with a shaggy dog story so immense that it makes Digby The Largest Dog in the World look like a Shih Tzu. Cannibal Nuns From Outer Space! is like no other book you will read this year, Bradshaw has done the unthinkable and delivered a book that is funnier and even more satisfying than Mr Sucky, which was previously my all time favourite comedy horror novel. Where he goes next is anyone's guess, all I know is I cannot wait to see what he produces next. Even if I have to buy a whole new drawer of boxers after wetting every pair of them thanks to this book. Cannibal Nuns from Outer Space! The summer blockbuster book! Probably. I know, you've been waiting for this. Tuck in. With an encyclopaedic knowledge of cake, and exclusive access to the church’s stockpile of holy weapons, the Order of the Crimson Rosary are on the frontline in the eternal war between good and evil. Whether it’s repelling demonic possession, judging the authenticity of supposed miracles or having the final say on the colour of bunting at church fetes, the organisation's members sacrifice their own freedom to keep the world safe. Father Flynn, the top operative in the UK, has been responsible for a number of recent high profile gaffs. Given an ultimatum, he must choose between returning to his old job of preserving the last microfiche machine in the church’s library, or submit himself for rehabilitation. Yet evil doesn’t take a ticket and wait in line, as the dreaded cannibal nuns from outer space land to begin their annual harvest. Can Flynn get himself sober enough to repel their evil machinations? Or will another idyllic British village become the nun’s latest buffet? One thing’s for certain, to beat them, Father Flynn is going to have to kick the habit. Book two in the GoreCom series, this time it's highly trained priests facing off against the titular cannibal nuns from outer space. Can the finest Crimson Rosary operatives in the UK thwart the nefarious plan to reduce another population centre to compote?   Comments are closed.
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